How To Be Free In Life

Humans have fought for more freedom in their lives since the dawn of time. That said, the struggle for freedom that we experience today is much different than in earlier times. No longer are a large share of people physically bound to mercy of those more powerful. Instead, we mostly have invisible restraints that make us desire for more freedom.

This blog post is for you if you are seeking inspiration for how you may increase the level of freedom in your life. 

I have always prioritized having as much freedom as possible at any given moment. There have been some periods where I’ve felt really constrained in life and others where I’ve felt pretty liberated. 

Fortunately, today I feel more free than I ever have thanks to the approach shared in this article.

Contents

What Does It Mean To Be Free?

There are many possible definitions for freedom.  Freedom to some could mean being able to go where they want, when they want. Freedom to others could mean having autonomy to do their jobs. At the same time, freedom to a young person could mean being able to spend time with friends while an elderly person may desire to move about the world without assistance.

At the end of the day, the one thing all definitions of freedom have at their core is choice. That is, the definition for freedom can ultimately be summarized as the ability for individuals to decide and make choices. 

A great article discussing the idea of freedom explains the concept further using a description of what it means to be unfree. They present the following quote by Pierre-Joseph Proudhon, a French politician who is considered the “father of anarchy”:

To be governed is to be watched, inspected, spied upon, directed, law-driven, numbered, regulated, enrolled, indoctrinated, preached at, controlled, checked, estimated, valued, censured, commanded, by creatures who have neither the right nor the wisdom nor the virtue to do so. To be governed is to be at every operation, at every transaction noted, registered, counted, taxed, stamped, measured, numbered, assessed, licensed, authorized, admonished, prevented, forbidden, reformed, corrected, punished. It is, under pretext of public utility, and in the name of the general interest, to be place under contribution, drilled, fleeced, exploited, monopolized, extorted from, squeezed, hoaxed, robbed; then, at the slightest resistance, the first word of complaint, to be repressed, fined, vilified, harassed, hunted down, abused, clubbed, disarmed, bound, choked, imprisoned, judged, condemned, shot, deported, sacrificed, sold, betrayed; and to crown all, mocked, ridiculed, derided, outraged, dishonored. That is government; that is its justice; that is its morality

A quote on freedom made by the Father of Anarchy is certainly one worth deep consideration. Even if we disagree with the concept of anarchy, understanding its tenets could help us frame what it means to be free a lot better.  

Now that we’ve established that freedom is all about choice, let’s get into how one might actually be able to become more free in this modern world we live in.

3 Principles For Maximum Freedom In Life

This article presents a set of principles you can live by to have more freedom in life. I’ve organized things by first presenting the high level principle followed by possible choices we can make to live out each principle. 

The caveat here is that not all people in all parts of the world enjoy the same levels of opportunity. Because of that, this list is not one size fits all and is certainly not prescriptive. Rather, this is my personal approach to being free. 

Ultimately, each of us must determine what is feasible for our own lives. And as you will see in this article, we must decide what difficult choices we are willing to make to become more free in life.

1) Exercise Your Freedom Of Thought And Expression

Your uniqueness matters and you should seek suitable ways to express that uniqueness. There is irony here in that we humans have fought for centuries for the freedom to speak, think, and express ourselves freely to now diverge into a society that prioritizes validation, consensus, and groupthink over the individual liberty we’ve fought so hard for. 

Nevertheless, as freedom seekers, we must embrace our individual thoughts and uniqueness while avoiding the temptation to alter our true identities .

Accept That There Is No Such Thing As Total Freedom. There Are Only Trade Offs

In general, practicing acceptance is a great way to live a more free life. Coming to terms with our upbringings, shortcomings, and unachieved dreams can bring a lot of peace. 

As an Economics student, the most valuable lesson I learned about life was that there are no total solutions or ways to have everything in life. Instead, life is all about tradeoffs. This concept also applies to the pursuit of more freedom in life. As we make choices that grant us more freedom, we will inevitably give up other things. 

For example, many people think that becoming rich will make them free. From my experience with rich people, this is simply not true. In fact, rich people often become enslaved by their wealth as they try to protect it from destruction, theft and underperformance. 

This is not to say that being rich is a bad thing. The goal here is to simply illustrate the concept of tradeoffs. Keep this in mind as you read through the rest of this list and think about what you may have to give up to become more free.

Slay Your Demons

Demons. Most of us have them in one way or another.

These could range from vices or addictions we can’t break free of. Or involve toxic relationships and mental health struggles. They could even be minor things like a nagging pile of mail that keeps on accumulating. The possibilities are endless. 

We’ve all had things to deal with in life. The key to becoming free in life is to face these things and actually deal with them. 

Granted, this can be easier said than done. We would all have perfect lives if it were that easy to solve our issues overnight. 

Fortunately, life doesn’t work like that. I say fortunately because it is the problems in our lives that give it meaning. More specifically, a meaningful life is one where we actively strive to overcome our struggles. 

Therefore, a noble use of your time and energy is spent facing your demons and slaying them so you can become more free. Ridding yourself of the things that hold you back will certainly result in a greater sense of freedom in life. 

Just keep in mind that as you do this, you will inevitably inherit new problems. Return to the previous section on tradeoffs if you don’t understand why.

Ditch The News (and Maybe the TV Altogether)

Nowadays we live in a culture that is so connected, we can literally get a live status report on the ground in practically any country in the world with just a few clicks. 

We can debate about whether this is good or bad later. The purpose of this article is to talk about freedom, which the watching news undoubtedly hinders. 

Why do I say this?

For starters, it comes down to the type of programming shown on the news. Most of what is shown involves some form of misery, disaster, trauma, unrest, or fear mongering. It is also how these things are shown that can limit our freedom. 

In the U.S., most of the news reporting comes from CNN or Fox News. These channels are heavily skewed towards the opposing political alignments of their respective audiences. In terms of being free in life, this is a problem because both audiences receive slanted information begins to mentally entrap them in their own special echo chambers.  

I recommend that those who are looking to gain more freedom cut out as much news viewing as possible. And for maximum freedom in life, you should cut out as much TV as possible. 

At  an average of 1,692 hours per year, we Americans are prolific TV watchers. This  amounts to a whopping 70.5 days that the average person spends glued to the tube. As mentioned in a previous section, many should wonder how much freer their lives would be if they slayed this one demon.

Tap Into Your Creativity

Take a moment to think about all the brilliant ideas you’ve had throughout your lifetime. Now consider the outcome of most of them?

Whether we recognize it or not, most of us have some level of innate creativity which we can tap into. For some, the creative juices are strong and drive their lives. For others, sparks of creativity may be less obvious or frequent.

Still, creativity in some form exists in all of us and tapping into your creativity is a great way to feel more free because of the unlimited potential it could provide.

An artist for example is not limited in the number of creations he can produce. Nor is the architect or the dancer. Similarly, I am not limited in any way in the content that I produce for this blog. My mind is the only limiting factor.

It is the boundless flexibility involved in creativity that lends to enhancing a sense of freedom. Even if we are constricted in other areas such as our jobs or families – we can still think up and produce our next great idea with few limitations.

Stop Caring About What Other People Think

As social creatures, we humans place a great deal of value on the opinions of others.

This was a valuable mechanism for survival in our earliest days since being accepted by the group was a matter of life or death. At one point in time, being disliked could mean being ousted from the cave, tribe, or community and left to fend for oneself. 

The dangers of being disliked today are much less severe, but the underlying fear of it happening is still real for many. This fear of rejection could lead to an inherent desire for approval by others which may cause us to live our lives in ways that entrap us to the mercy of those opinions. 

As a result, we may mentally and physically limit our own freedom as we become overly concerned with what other people think about us.

Common ways I see this manifest with adults is through seeking validation via social media, from bosses and colleagues at work, or from members of the opposite sex. I personally know men who adopt certain fashion styles to appear more agreeable to women even though the trends don’t necessarily suit their personal tastes. 

Living life in such a manner may indeed work if the goal is to gain approval from others. Contrarily, this is not be the viable path for the attainment of the most freedom because it takes us away from our individual identities and makes us reliant on others for peace and wellbeing.

Get Off The Timeline

A key principle for a free life is exercising freedom of thought and expression.

Social media has certainly amplified our abilities to express ourselves. At the same time, it has been designed in a freedom limiting manner in that it creates digital environments that limit our abilities to exercise a full range of thoughts and ideas.

We’ve all heard of and experienced the algorithms. 

I caught myself falling victim to this trap a few years ago with Youtube. It started with a tempting video title on a hot button social issue. One click, and a watch later and my feed of recommended videos featured more of the same type of content. I found myself a few months later trapped in a mental web of content that was admittedly difficult to break free from. 

Having content specifically tailored in this manner entraps us into singular modes of thinking with no way out. 

A better path for those seeking more freedom in life would be to limit social media exposure and spend more time interacting with the real world.

Get Off The Beaten Path

I’m fascinated with Disney. Every year, millions of people pay considerable prices to flock through its gates for what promises to be a magical experience. For children, Disney is a reasonable experience given their budding imaginations. Yet, there are many adults who frequent the park for their dose of contrived fun as well. 

Take for instance Disney’s adult focused Epcot park featuring the popular “Drinking Around the World” experience. For a ticket costing  $109 – $150, a person can purchase the privilege of entering the park to eat and drink at establishments designed to mimic destinations such as France, Morroco, and Germany. 

Several years ago I attended the Drinking Around the World experience and could not help but wonder how this contrived experience at Disney appeals more than simply traveling to either of the represented countries in real life. Drinking Saki amongst locals in Tokyo beats standing in the hot Florida sun amongst screaming kids and plexiglass cutouts any day. 

Disney works for many because it is safe, controlled, and predictable – all things that do not bode well for a person looking to achieve freedom in life.

A better path to be free would be to break away from the beaten path and look for adventure on the road less traveled. Rather than waiting in long lines at theme parks, get outside and engage with the real world. Skydive, climb mountains, hike uncharted terrains. Or simply go hang out where the locals do.

This sense of adventure and connectivity with the world is a great way to feel more free because you won’t be inhibited by the boundaries of the safety that so many seek.

Think Outside The Box

Freedom is not found by following conventions and rules. Instead, being free means boldly taking on the world in exciting new ways.

Along these lines, one great way to be more free in life is to allow yourself to think differently, unconventionally, or from a fresh perspective. 

Children, for example, are admired for how freely they express opinions and ideas. Adults on the other hand have learned to conform and limit their thinking for fear of reprisal or shame from the crowd. Or perhaps adult life forces us to lose our creative sparks. 

Those who are seeking more freedom in life must tap back into their ability to think in novel and creative ways. The mind is powerful for shaping how we feel in life and using it as freely as possible is a liberating experience.

Establish And Enforce Boundaries

Boundaries equal freedom. As counterintuitive as it may sound, establishing and enforcing personal boundaries is a great way to achieve freedom in life. This is because boundaries help us establish expectations and limits for our lives as opposed to being at life’s whim. 

One of my only regrets in life came several years ago when I failed to set a boundary with a former boss. The short version of the story is that he manipulated me into giving up my entire 2 month summer vacation to fill in for him as lead for a summer youth camp. 

At the time, I was feeling burned out and looking forward to the long break from work. Lacking the courage to say no, I accepted the role and have regretted it ever since. 

Stories like mine are common if we don’t effectively set boundaries. Without boundaries, we are susceptible to whatever life throws our way whether we like it or not. It is ultimately up to us to determine what boundaries we deem important.

Once established, we must then enforce our boundaries in order to enjoy the freedom we desire.

2) Prioritize Flexibility By Eliminating Constraints, Burdens, and Commitments

The antithesis of freedom is being constrained, burdened, and committed to things that limit our ability to move freely and make the choices we truly want to make. 

Such barriers to our freedom are so commonplace today that many of us are unlikely to even notice their impact. Instead, we accept these things as normal because most of them are indeed common features of our evolved society.

The individual seeking more freedom in life will have to pay attention to these traps and avoid them wherever possible. Here are some actions you can take to ensure you have maximum flexibility and freedom in your life.

Avoid Debt

Debt is wonderful in that it enables us to purchase things before we truly have the funds to do so. On the flip side, debt is a trap that could leave us financially bound with a reduced sense of freedom in life.

I’ve talked extensively about the benefits of a debt free lifestyle because I truly believe that being debt free is the better path, especially for those hoping to feel more free. 

The problem with debt is that it imposes an obligation on our future earnings. 

Just ask 26 million people who thought they were getting student loan forgiveness. Many of us took out five and six figure loans to fund our education. Decades later, we find that we are still paying off those debts with little hope for a way out. 

Does that sound free to you? I think not. 

A radically different approach to achieve freedom in life would be to avoid all debt. Paying for things with cash will likely mean you will have fewer things. At the same time, you will have more freedom by way of fewer obligations.

Avoid Most Contracts

Simply put, contracts exist to hold the various parties liable to the terms stated within the written agreement. This is why the term contractual obligations exists –  it alludes to the fact that the contract binds the parties to the stated terms. 

Contracts are necessary from a business perspective because they help keep us accountable. At the same time, contacts may be horrible from a freedom perspective for this very same reason.   

The more obligated and bound by contracts we become, the less freedom we enjoy. 

The person with contracts such as a mortgage, employment commitments, or other agreements such as the one signed by NFL player Gervon Dexter is less free in life than the equivalent person who avoided such obligations. 

In my opinion, our inability to predict the future is one of the main reasons we should avoid contracts. Avoiding years or decade long agreements is a great way to maintain our future flexibility and decision making which is the definition of having maximum freedom.

Pay A Higher Price If It Means Greater Flexibility

As mentioned in the previous section, freedom is gained by limiting commitments and obligations in life. Unfortunately, freedom often comes with a cost – higher costs that is. 

My current gym costs me a steep $77 on a month to month basis. This is quite high for a gym membership at double what I could pay with a year long commitment. 

So why pay more? For the flexibility, of course. 

I benefit from paying more for my gym membership each month. On one hand, I have the flexibility to quickly pivot to a new gym if desired. I also have the benefit of not having my long term finances obligated to a single entity which enhances my sense of financial freedom.  

The possibilities to hook us today are endless. Companies have cleverly figured out that people will gladly opt for lower monthly costs in exchange for longer term commitments. Avoid this trap if you hope to maintain your sense of freedom. 

Become More Self-Reliant

What happens when your car breaks down? Or when you can’t open that jar of pickles or reach the top shelf at the supermarket?

Such occurrences often mean that we must rely on the help of someone else which limits our ability to act, move, and choose in the moment. The person who has to schedule with a mechanic, wait for service, and pay for the repair enjoys far less freedom than the person who can fix the car themselves. 

Self reliance makes us more free because it increases our flexibility. As we become more capable of handling things ourselves, we enjoy more choice on how to get things done. We also enjoy more freedom to move about and act in ways we desire rather than being dedicated to the whims, rules, prices and systems of others.

Learn To Say No

When it comes to being free in life, the word “no” is perhaps the single most powerful word in our vocabularies. That said, saying no is tough because we often fear that others will be disappointed in us if we deny them. As a result, we can find ourselves giving in to things we don’t always want. 

Our aversion to saying no likely stems from us being social creatures or conditioning we experience from birth. It makes sense that we want to please others and be a part of the group because this is what being human is all about. 

Be that as it may, exercising our ability to say no is powerful for achieving freedom. Each time we say no to things that don’t suit us, we inherently say yes to other things that do. And as we fill our lives with things that align with what we want, we begin to feel more free.

Stop The Chase

Ambition is a double edged sword. On one hand, ambitions can add a lot of purpose to our lives. Being ambitious can also be a source of pride as we accomplish our goals. On the other hand, constantly chasing goals can become yet another form of bondage if taken too far. 

Knowing when enough is actually enough can be difficult. As a result, many people become enslaved to the chase.

The most obvious example would be chasing money. There is a nearly endless supply of cash in the world, so those who seek it for the sheer sake of accumulation may find that they are never truly satisfied – unable to break free of the desire for more.

Other things I’ve seen people chase include clothes, travels, women, and even social media hits. 

I have a lot of admiration for my less ambitious friends who seem to have more peace in life. We can all learn something about contentment from these people.

3) Prioritize Freedom Of Movement And Action

To be free in life means to exercise your natural ability to move and act in accordance with our own individual inclination. This includes expressing your ability to physically move your body in the way it was naturally designed and moving about the world as you please. Also included here is your ability to make choices for your life (action). 

A free person is one who has a body that is healthy enough to take it where we desire to go and use it in a manner we think best. A free person is also someone whose mind is strong enough to envision possibilities in life. And courageous enough to turn those possibilities into reality.

Change Your Environment

I believe that environment is critical for how our lives turn out. Many of us inherit our environments and stay in them without second thought to whether they align with what we want from life. 

I’m always fascinated by this idea as I drive through small towns. I always find myself asking how people end up in the places they live. The answer is that most people simply inherited their environments. 

That said, changing your environment is a great way to be free in life. 

Oftentimes, our environments constrict us which is the exact opposite of being free. For example, a child raised in an extremely conservative environment may eventually find those values constricting as the mature. This person could enhance their sense of freedom by breaking free of their household, neighborhood, or city.  

Other ways to change your environment for greater freedom would be making new friends, listening to new music & podcasts, or switching up the TV programming. 

Don’t Have Children

There is no doubting the fact that children are a wonderful joy in the lives of their families. I can confirm this as I have 6 nephews and nieces myself. Few things are more gratifying than playing with the children in the family and watching them grow. 

In spite of the joy they bring, children also impose a significant burden and commitment on their parents. And because more commitments equal less freedom, not having children is a great way to ensure maximum liberty in life. 

Financially speaking, the USDA has been tracking the cost of raising a child since 1960. Their estimates showed that middle income parents giving birth to a child in 2015 could expect to spend $23,716 per month. This amounts to $284,594 over a 17 year period. Updated data by the Brookings Institute shows that this figure is now $310,605 due to inflation.

Perhaps more significant than the financial commitment imposed by children is the time requirements. Simply put, raising children takes a lot of work, attention, and time. 

In their American Time Use Survey, The Bureau of Labor Statistics reports that parents spend an average of 9 hours per week caring for children. This comes out to 469 hours per year and breaks down to roughly 20 round the clock days per year solely focused on children. 

Sure, 20 days may not sound like a huge commitment in the grand scheme of things. But, this figure only captures hands-on activities. We must also consider that parents are essentially permanently on call until their children become independent.  

Being free in life means that we primarily maximize our time and choices. Unfortunately, the time and responsibility requirements involved with raising children don’t align will with this goal. 

Don’t Get Married

I’ve previously said that love is a key component to my definition of living a rich life. Deep and meaningful romantic love is a special thing we all deserve to experience in life.

A termed coined for common relationship progression is known as the Relationship Escalator which can be summarized as follows:

The default set of societal expectations for intimate relationships. Partners follow a progressive set of steps, each with visible markers, toward a clear goal. The goal at the top of the Escalator is to achieve a permanently monogamous (sexually and romantically exclusive between two people), cohabitating marriage — legally sanctioned if possible. In many cases, buying a house and having kids is also part of the goal. Partners are expected to remain together at the top of the Escalator until death. The Escalator is the standard by which most people gauge whether a developing intimate relationship is significant, “serious,” good, healthy, committed or worth pursuing or continuing.

There is nothing wrong with going along the relationship escalator. It is so common because of how well it could work for people.

Unfortunately, we must question whether the relationship escalator is the best path for achieving maximum freedom. 

Traditional relationships require significant amounts of time, attention, and effort to maintain. And even more inputs to actually thrive over the long run. This is probably the reason so many relationships fail. It is extremely difficult for people to consistently give so much of themselves over a long period of time. 

Another key component of marriage is sacrifice. It is simply impossible to join lives with another person and not make concessions somewhere. Because of this, those who opt for marriage also choose to give up some degree of freedom. 

As radical as it may sound, not getting married is a perfectly viable path for someone seeking freedom in life. Of course, there are tradeoffs to this path that many may find unacceptable. Still, it may work for you and is certainly worth consideration.

Find Meaningful Work

Work is an inescapable fact of life for the vast majority of us. As a result, being stuck in lackluster work is a surefire way to feel less free in life. This is because there is an intricate relationship between our lives and our work. 

We need money for survival and to acquire things vital to our lives and happiness. As such, the money to acquire these things is made through work. 

This means that our jobs are essentially vital to our survival and happiness.

Pretty obvious, right? Well, less obvious is what happens when we do jobs we dislike out of necessity for survival and happiness. 

In this scenario, the job can become a source of misery that we are beholden to out of necessity. We must return to this source of misery each day or face grave consequences such as not being able to put food on the table or keep the lights on. 

Such a scenario certainly results in feeling stuck or trapped which are the antithesis of freedom. 

Conversely, a person working out of necessity in a job they find meaningful is likely to have a totally different experience. A person who enjoys the work they do gladly returns each day because they see their work as a privilege. They don’t feel trapped because they aren’t living in a situation which they hope to escape. There is no misery from work when you love your work, only joy.

Most of us need jobs for survival. If you find that this applies to you and you also seek more freedom, then you may want to consider moving into work you find meaningful.

Move More. A Lot More

Movement is the essence of the human experience. We may take this fact for granted, but consider what life would be like if our capacities for mobility were significantly limited. Sports, dancing, hiking, and many other common activities may no longer exist. 

One of the things I loved most during my days as a competitive athlete was pregame warmups. I fondly remember gliding through the air before a basketball game or blazing across a forty yard distance with minimal effort before football games. 

Those were the moments I felt most free in life. 

Even if you aren’t participating in a competitive sport or formal activity, movement is still possible. The simple act of taking a walk can produce similar results. 

One way to enrich the movement experience for a greater sense of freedom is to practice mindfulness while you are doing it. Rather than simply going for a walk, enhance the experience by tuning into your surroundings. Take your time to note the colors, sounds, and textures around you. Also tune into your body man’s what it feels. Such exercise makes for a deeper experience.

The following video captures the essence of movement for freedom quite well. 

Spend More Time Alone

Have you ever tried to plan a vacation with a large group of people? How did that work out for you? I once tried this with a group of pals and we are still working on solidifying those plans nearly a decade later. 

One thing any solo traveler will tell you is that there is great freedom in trekking around the world alone. The fewer people involved in the planning, the more free things become. The reason for this is because we are all unique with a specific set of opinions, tastes, preferences, and desires.

Thus, any situation becomes more free as we reduce the number of people with maximum freedom achieved at the point of complete solitude. 

Face Your Fears

Courage is the hallmark of freedom. On the flipside fear has probably held more people back from living a life of freedom than any single other thing. How many dreams are unrealized because a person lacked the courage to see it through?

We’ve all experienced a version of fear in one of its many forms. For some, their fear can be so strong that it holds them back and prevents them from living a life they desire to live. In this manner, a person can be imprisoned by their fear and never feel free. 

Those of us who seek freedom have learned to face most of our fears – or at least the ones that truly hold us back. For example, I’ve overcome my professional fear of being negatively judged by colleagues which has helped me excel in my career. 

I’ve learned through this process that overcoming fears is not only empowering, but also liberating. This is because facing fears teaches us that there are few true boundaries in life – which is the hallmark freedom.

Your Version Of Freedom

As I’ve already mentioned, there is no single definition of freedom. The principles and ideas in this articles are things that I think can result in more freedom in life.

That said, you may have you own definition of freedom. If so, I’d love to hear your perspective and approach to what it means to be free. 

What is your definition of freedom. Further, what steps do you think people can take to feel more free in life?

 

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